Everyone Celebrated. I Cleaned 3 Buildings and Survived an Airbnb From Hell

Amsterdam woke up today with one mission: celebrate, dance, drink, sing loudly in the street, and completely forget what “quiet behavior” means.

And me?

I woke up with a mop, a vacuum cleaner, three VvE buildings, one Airbnb disaster, and exactly ZERO coworkers.

For who doesn't know what Vve is....... just google.

back to story.."))

So because apparently everyone else had better ideas today.

Some were at festivals. Some were “sick.

”One guy sent me a message at 7:03 AM saying:

“Boss, today I need to reconnect spiritually with myself.”

Spiritually? Brother, I needed someone to reconnect spiritually with the vacuum cleaner....f..k

So there I was.

Alone.

One cleaning warrior against the entire city of Amsterdam.

This is the story of how today nearly defeated me.

But not completely.

Because at Cleaning24NL, we don’t quit.

We just complain dramatically while carrying heavy trash bags down impossible Dutch staircases.

7:00 AM – The Day Begins With False Confidence

The weather looked beautiful.

That was suspicious already.

In Amsterdam, sunshine means only one thing:

Chaos.

People become optimistic. Dangerous things happen. Tourists rent bicycles they absolutely cannot control. Somebody starts playing techno music at breakfast.

I made coffee. Strong coffee. The kind that doesn’t ask questions.

I looked at the schedule:

• 1 Airbnb cleaning

• 3 VvE buildings

• No team

• Celebration day traffic everywhere

I laughed.

Not because it was funny.

Because sometimes your brain protects you by pretending things are normal.

First Mission: The Airbnb of Doom

The Airbnb was located on the third floor of one of those classic Amsterdam buildings designed by a man who clearly hated furniture movers.

The stairs were vertical.

Not “steep.”

Vertical.

I’m convinced mountain goats look at Amsterdam staircases and say:

“Absolutely not.”

I arrived at 8:10 AM.

Outside the apartment were:

• 11 empty beer bottles

• one traffic cone

• a single shoe

• and somehow… a pineapple.

Nobody knows why.

The guests were checking out while singing ABBA.

One guy looked at me and said:

“We tried to clean a little.”

That sentence is always terrifying.

Because guests who say “we cleaned a little” usually mean:

• they stacked plates into a modern art sculpture

• moved dirt into different rooms

• and hid garbage in places scientists still cannot explain.

They left.

I opened the apartment door.

Silence.

Then…

The smell hit me.

I don’t know what happened in there last night, but I’m pretty sure several international laws were violated.

There was glitter everywhere.

EVERYWHERE.

How does glitter travel like this?

You clean one corner and suddenly it appears behind you like a horror movie villain.

I found glitter:

• in the bathroom

• inside a coffee cup

• on the television

• somehow under the refrigerator

• and once, emotionally, in my soul.

The Mystery of the Missing Remote Control

Every Airbnb has one mystery.

Today’s mystery:

Where was the TV remote?

I searched everywhere.

Couch cushions.

Kitchen cabinets.

Bathroom shelves.

Freezer.

Yes, freezer.

You laugh now, but if you clean Airbnbs long enough, nothing surprises you anymore.

I once found a passport inside a washing machine.

Another time somebody left 27 lemons in a suitcase.

No explanation.

Just lemons.

Today’s remote finally appeared inside the oven.

Why?

Nobody knows.

Maybe the remote needed warmth.

Maybe the guests were drunk.

Maybe the remote had given up on life.

The Great Bed Sheet Battle

Changing Airbnb bed sheets sounds simple.

It is not.

Especially when fitted sheets decide to become aggressive.

I was wrestling a mattress alone like I was competing in the Olympics of suffering.

One corner goes on.

Another corner escapes.

You pull left.

The right side explodes off.

At one point I was trapped INSIDE the bedsheet like a confused ghost.

If any neighbors looked through the window, they probably thought:

“Ah yes, the cleaner has finally lost his mind.”

And honestly?

Fair.

The Vacuum Cleaner Betrayal

At 10:15 AM, disaster struck.

The vacuum cleaner started making a sound I can only describe as:

“Dutch techno mixed with dying tractor.”

Then it stopped.

I stared at it.

The vacuum stared back.

This was personal now.

I unplugged it. Replugged it. Pressed every button like a desperate airplane pilot.

Nothing.

Then suddenly it came back to life with FULL POWER and scared me so badly I nearly vacuumed my own shoelaces.

This is what cleaning does to a person.

You stop fearing horror movies.

You start fearing appliances.

Outside: Amsterdam Had Become a Festival

The streets were packed.

Music everywhere.

Tourists walking in bicycle lanes with the confidence of people who have never seen danger before.

One man in orange sunglasses was dancing beside a canal at 11 in the morning like he personally invented happiness.

Meanwhile I was carrying cleaning supplies like a defeated medieval traveler.

I passed a group of people drinking champagne on a boat.

One of them shouted:

“Enjoy the weather!”

Brother.

I’m carrying six kilograms of garbage and a mop bucket.

There is no weather anymore.

There is only survival.

VvE Building Number One – The Elevator That Hates Humanity

First VvE building.

Simple job, I thought.

Quick cleaning. Hallways. Stairs. Entrance.

Easy.

Then I saw the elevator.

Out of order.

Of course.

Because elevators in Amsterdam only work when you don’t need them.

I carried everything upstairs manually.

Bucket.Vacuum.Cleaning products.Cloths.Pain.Regret.

On the third floor an old resident opened the door and said:

“You’re working today? Shame!”

SHAME?

Madam, I KNOW.

Then she offered me a cookie.

Suddenly life had meaning again.

The Hallway Incident

While cleaning the hallway, I accidentally activated one of those motion-sensor lights.

Except this one was broken.

It switched on… then off… then on again… then started flickering like a haunted nightclub.

So there I was:

• alone

• mopping stairs

• under flashing lights

• while techno music from outside echoed through the windows

It felt less like cleaning and more like I had entered an underground rave for exhausted adults.

Lunch Break (Not Really)

At 1:30 PM I attempted lunch.

Attempted.

I bought a sandwich.

I sat on a bench near a canal.

Peace at last.

Then a seagull landed nearby.

Now, experienced Amsterdam people know this look.

This wasn’t a normal bird.

This was a criminal.

The seagull stared directly into my soul and calculated my weaknesses.

I looked away for ONE SECOND.

ONE.

That bird attacked like a fighter jet.

He stole half my sandwich and flew away proudly while people laughed.

Even the pigeons looked impressed.

So if anyone asks: today I shared lunch with wildlife.

Against my will.

VvE Building Number Two – The Smell Nobody Could Explain

Every cleaner knows this situation.

You enter a building and immediately think:

“What IS that smell?”

Not a normal smell.

A mysterious smell.

The kind of smell that makes you question physics.

This building smelled like:

• wet socks

• old cheese

• maybe onions

• and emotional damage

I checked everything.

Trash containers.

Hallways.

Mail area.

Nothing.

Then I found the source.

Someone had left shrimp in a bicycle bag near the basement.

SHRIMP.

Why?

Again:Amsterdam gives no explanations.

Only experiences.

The Resident Who Wanted to Talk Forever

While cleaning the entrance, one resident stopped me for “a quick question.”

This is dangerous language.

Because “quick question” in Amsterdam can become a 47-minute life story.

Before I knew it, he was explaining:

• housing prices

• bicycle politics

• his opinions about German tourists

• and why modern vacuum cleaners are weaker than the ones from 1994

I nodded respectfully while mentally calculating how many hours of daylight remained.

At some point he said:

“You cleaners see everything.”

And honestly?

We do.

Cleaners know the real truth about humanity.

We know:

• who secretly eats in bed

• who owns seventeen pairs of identical shoes

• who pretends they don’t smoke indoors

• and who somehow creates chaos in a studio apartment after staying only one night

We are the silent witnesses of civilization.

VvE Building Number Three – The Final Boss

By now my body was operating on:

• caffeine

• determination

• and whatever energy remained from the stolen sandwich incident

The third building looked innocent.

It was not innocent.

Someone had apparently hosted a children’s birthday party in the common area recently.

There were sticky fingerprints EVERYWHERE.

Walls.

Doors.

Glass

.Even the intercom.

How do children touch ceilings?

Scientists need to investigate this.

I cleaned for what felt like seventeen years.

At one point I found glitter AGAIN.

THE GLITTER HAD FOLLOWED ME.

The Mop Bucket Catastrophe

Near the end of the job, disaster nearly destroyed me completely.

I was carrying the mop bucket downstairs carefully.

Very carefully.

Like a man transporting dangerous chemicals.

Then…

One tiny mistake.

The bucket tilted.

Dirty water escaped with the confidence of a prison break.

Straight across the freshly cleaned floor.

I froze.

The universe froze.

Somewhere in the distance, festival music continued.

I looked at the floor.

The floor looked back.

And then I did what every professional cleaner does in moments like this:

I sighed dramatically and started over.

The Hidden Truth About Cleaning

People think cleaning is simple.

But cleaning is adventure.

Cleaning is psychology.Cleaning is detective work.Cleaning is cardio.Cleaning is survival.

You never know what you’ll find.

Sometimes:

• money

• lost jewelry

• phones

• mysterious stains that science cannot classify

One time we found a fake mustache stuck behind a radiator.

To this day, nobody has answers.

And honestly?

That’s what makes this work hilarious.

Every day becomes a story.

Every building has characters.

Every Airbnb feels like opening a mystery box created by tired tourists and bad decisions.

The Tourist Encounter

On my way back to the van, two tourists stopped me.

They asked:

“Excuse me, do you know where the party is?”

I looked around.

The entire city WAS the party.

A man was playing saxophone on a bicycle.Someone else wore orange pants and angel wings.A boat passed full of people singing terribly.

I said:

“Just follow the noise and poor decisions.”

They thanked me like I had given profound wisdom.

Why We Keep Doing This

After a day like today, people ask:

“Why continue?”

Simple.

Because there’s something satisfying about turning chaos into order.

You enter disaster.

You leave cleanliness.

It’s like being a superhero.

A tired superhero with lower back pain.

But still.

At Cleaning24NL, we secretly love the madness.

We love:

• impossible Airbnb turnovers

• dramatic staircases

• shiny hallways after cleaning

• happy clients

• and the ridiculous stories that happen every single week

Because no office job can compete with:

“Today I fought a seagull for a sandwich while removing glitter from a microwave.”

That’s real life experience.

The Final Moment of Victory

By evening, Amsterdam was still celebrating.

Music everywhere.

Boats everywhere.

People dancing everywhere.

And me?

I finished the last building.

I stood there exhausted.

The hallways were clean.

The Airbnb looked perfect again.

The floors shined.The trash was gone.

I looked like a warrior returning from battle.

A slightly sweaty warrior smelling faintly of lemon cleaning spray.

But victorious.

And honestly?

There’s pride in that.

While the city partied, somebody still had to keep Amsterdam clean.

Today, that somebody was me.

Alone.

Moral of the Story

If you ever think your workday was stressful…

Remember there’s probably a cleaner somewhere:

• carrying vacuum cleaners up four floors

• hunting missing Airbnb remotes

• fighting glitter

• surviving aggressive seagulls

• and cleaning mystery shrimp smells from basements

All before dinner.

So next time you see a cleaner in Amsterdam…

Respect them.

We have seen things.

Follow Us for More Cleaning Adventures

At Cleaning24NL, cleaning isn’t boring.

It’s comedy.

It’s chaos.

It’s Amsterdam at full power.

And trust us…

This was NOT even our craziest story.

Follow us for more behind-the-scenes cleaning adventures, Airbnb disasters, strange discoveries, impossible staircases, and survival stories from the wild world of professional cleaning in Amsterdam.

Because tomorrow?

Who knows.

Maybe we’ll find another remote control in somebody's asss